Tag Archives: forgiveness

My Sweet Revenge

‘Next’ Angel G announced.

Finally, my turn. My turn to see the King.

A few moments ago, I had been in church- praising and dancing. The joy just seemed to pour over me in waves and soon, it didnt even matter what song the praise leader was raising. I was in another zone.

Tap dancing, breakdancing, azonto, etighi… all the dance steps in the world were not enough to express my joy at being in the very courts of eternity.

Then, they came and whispered to me that I was one of the few going to see Him face to face today.

Oh yeah?

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Seeing Angel Gabriel face to face was mindblowing enough. I was going to see the King!!!!

When he called me forward for my turn, let me confess, I ran forward, too eager to wait one more moment. But the Archangel stopped me, with a smile

‘Just one moment, sir, while we scan you’ And he brought out this Security Scanner

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Wow

Anyway, as I was sure I was not carrying any bombs, I unhesitatingly raised my hands above my head.

That’s how the scanner started beeping red.

Before I knew it, a dozen security angels had surrounded me. With guns. And they were not laughing

‘What are you carrying?’ Angel G’s tone had turned stern

‘Nothing’ I stuttered ‘Honestly. Offi…’

‘Search your pockets’ He told me

My hand hit something as I hastily complied…. wait a minute….

I pulled out  a small package as all the surrounding angels took a step back.

I recognized the package.

My ex flatmate deeply wronged me 2 months ago. The kind of ‘deep wronging’ that led to the break up of my 7 month old relationship and me moving out of the flat. 

That small package was called Unforgiveness. And bitterness. And my hope that she would reap all that she had sown. And that my hope that God and life would punish her.

‘Calm down, angels. At ease’ Angel G said, and they all complied immediately. Then to me,

‘Drop that package in the bin right there and we will rescan you. Then you may enter’

Sounds simple enough.

Except that I wasnt ready to part with this package. Not until God punished her.

‘Umm… Angel G… I understand I cannot go in with this’ I was saying ‘Please can I keep it on the side and collect it back when I get out’

‘You may not’ Angel G’s tone did not change ‘It will only drop if you have no intentions of coming back to it again. Now, please hurry up- your time window is closing’

‘You dont understand Angel G’ My voice shook ‘You dont know what she did. You dont know how I suffered. And I did absolutely nothing back. All I did was cry. She must pay for it’

‘Not forgiving her is not justice.’ He said ‘You must let that package go’

I held the package close to my heart. This little thing had comforted me in times when I felt no one knew exactly how the whole shindig had shaken my faith in humanity. In times when I felt utterly stupid that I hadnt physically assaulted her. Not even one small slap…

‘But if I let it go, where is my justice? How can she just go scott free like that?’ I wailed

You will go scott free’ Angel G answered ‘And you will get to see the King. What will you give in exchange for seeing the King? Drop it at once. Your time slot is running out’

Tears were running down face. But I shook my head

‘There’s an attorney here that can help you. His name is H.S.’ Angel G was saying ‘He’ll walk you through…’

‘Is he going to promise to avenge me?’ I asked bitterly

I knew the answer even before I saw Angel G’s sad smile. Even before I heard the bell ringing that my time slot was done. Even before I saw myself back in church, no longer singing, no longer dancing, no longer about to enter the presence of the King.

The joy was gone. And the peace. And i learnt absolutely nothing in church that day.

It was not worth it, I know. But I just couldn’t let go of that little black box I carried around on my soul.

 “And how does a man benefit if he gains the whole world and loses his soul in the process?  For is anything worth more than his soul?

Mark 8:36-37

The Living Bible translation


 

Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Eph 4:31-32

New International Version

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Tough Love

So this has been put up some weeks ago… but it was right in the middle of the DASH campaigns so I planned to put it out by itself once more.

Enjoy


Sounds like an oxymoron, dont it?

We all know love is supposed to be vulnerable and ‘soft’. That’s when you are referring to romantic love. In the early stages.

Love for your 5 year married, never-putting-away-his-clothes, husband might be slightly different. And of course, love for your siblings is a different animal, particularly when you were kids and teenagers.

Anyway there concept of being tough, while loving sounds like opposites.

But let us take a very slightly different turn. Instead of talking about being firm with those we love, what about those times that it is TOTALLY difficult/impossible to love those people we are supposed to love.

Continue reading Tough Love